Harvey Updyke has been indicted on four felony charges and two misdemeanors for allegedly poisoning Auburn's historic Toomer's Corner oak trees at some point after the 2010 Iron Bowl. If you'd like a look into what could cause a person to allegedly do such a thing, you'll find no better resource than this interview of Updyke and his Slim Shady alias Al From Dadeville, at a "catfish place down in the swamp," in which Updyke both claims he wanted to get caught and maintains his innocence.
Huh? Yes. He also claims high pressure water was killing the Toomer's trees anyway. The mercy killer.
The story plots a convincing timeline of Updyke's supposed (would call it "admitted," but can we really state he's admitted it when he's denied it more times than he's admitted it?) poisoning, from the birth of his Alabama fandom to that Iron Bowl loss.
The entire thing is nuts, of course, but a muted kind of crazy that comes from Updyke informing you just how crazy he is:
Well, I'm just a very unhealthy Alabama fan. live it. I breathe it. I think about Alabama football, I'm not exaggerating, 18 hours a day. I have always been that way. It just didn't start. That's what people don't understand. The first thing I do when I wake up in the morning is get on Tiderinsider and see what's going on. I mean, I know it's not healthy. I've been knowing that a long time. I have a daughter 33 years old named Crimson Tyde.