Those of us with an unhealthy fixation on the mental state of Falcons' quarterback Matt Ryan have enjoyed a productive week: Fans voted him out of EA Sports' competition to determine the cover athlete for Madden '12 - either in a grassroots crusade to keep him from suffering the legendary "Madden Curse" (something the AJC had no problem taking credit for) - or maybe just because Peyton Hillis better represents the dashed athletic dreams of our nation's gamer culture.
Ryan also married his college sweetheart, the former Sarah Marshall, in a secret weekend wedding on a Georgia beach. And while some fans might argue that athlete nuptials aren't newsworthy, or just choose to dwell on the awesome boobies-touching power the bachelorhood of a NFL quarterback commands, others among us celebrate Ryan's VERY notable decision to settle down. Because our Matty Ice doesn't need DISTRACTIONS, and because a great marriage is built on love, support and WINNING A WORLD TITLE OR FIVE IMMEDIATELY HAHA JK JK JK. OR NOT. TXT ME BACK, MATT, K?
When it's your quarterback, these things matter. Granted, this level of concern for a favorite player is usually the work of the kind of fan found sending unsolicited Facebook messages to college football recruits at 2:30 a.m. while arguing about hip fluidity on Scout, BUT: just like other misunderstandings (what is "misdemeanor harassment," really?), working to avoid a fictitious video game Curse while encouraging the stability of marriage is about looking out for YOUR best interests, Matthew. We're helping you Matt. We're helping the TEAM.