One day, when schronyized flying cars nullify the modern-day woes of traffic, Atlanta sports fans will search desperately for a go-to excuse for not showing up to sporting events on time. Maybe in the future Georgia will be ravaged by the first of many cyborg-zombie wars, and the locals can cite that as the reason for getting to a NFL game 90 minutes late.
Courtesy of the AJC, here's the ATL bein' SO DAMN ATL, unfortunately:
But wait! There's hope for the reputation of our sports fandom! Apparently new Georgia Dome security procedures are being installed tonight. By "new," we're assuming it's something past the standard, stringent "Finish your beers and please place all knives and blunt object weapons in a purse or bodily crevice" policy the Dome's so famous for.