As Senator Blutarsky laments in his own SEC Power Poll ballot, we may be headed toward yet another season in which we're all stuck waiting for the Alabama-LSU game the first week of November and everything before then is just the undercard. That still leaves ample opportunity, however, to chortle at the pretenders as they fall one by one. This week's "Oh, You Thought You Were a Contender, That's So Adorable" award goes to Arkansas, inexplicable victims of an overtime upset at the hands of UL-Monroe. Don't laugh, Auburn fans, you guys could be next.
Full poll will be tallied up at Team Speed Kills on Wednesday.
1. Alabama — No sweats were broken in their 35-0 win over Western Kentucky, nor s%&#s given. And after the egg Arkansas laid on Saturday, Nick Saban may have to suspend his "You Must Respect Our Opponent" media policy for a week.
2. LSU — Exhibited little mercy in wiping the floor with the Washington Huskies, and they still don't seem to be missing Tyrann Mathieu all that badly, either.
3. Georgia — Missouri may be the trickiest offense the Dawgs face all season, but their defense dispensed with Mizzou handily despite missing three starters (four if you count Chase Vasser). You don't necessarily have to bet on the Dawgs in every game they play this season, but you'd be well advised to take the under.
4. Tennessee — Tyler Bray has already carpet-bombed one supposedly stout secondary this season (N.C. State's); if he can do it to a second when the Gators come to town this weekend, the Vols are officially on their way back.
5. South Carolina — The 330-yard, three-TD day from backup QB Dylan Thompson was a nice distraction from the fact that Marcus Lattimore only picked up 40 yards on 13 carries. It's one thing to have both Lattimore and Conor Shaw gimpy against last year's 97th-ranked scoring defense, though; it'll be another entirely if they're still ailing when the Gamecocks hit the meat of their SEC schedule.
6. Mississippi State — Dan Mullen finally gets his first win against an SEC West team not named Ole Miss. He'll more than likely get a second this season when the Razorbacks come to town.
7. Florida — The offense is still doing just enough to get by, but to shut out Texas A&M for the entire second half was impressive. The Gators still aren't a great team, but they could be a pretty good one.
8. Missouri — The Tigers' spread attack is still going to spring a nasty surprise on someone, maybe a couple someones, in the SEC East this season. Jarvis Jones isn't much for surprises, though.
9. Texas A&M — The Aggies' talent at the offensive skill positions can match up with anyone in the SEC, but like Mizzou, they've discovered that a bone-crunching defense still trumps just about everything else in this league.
10. Auburn — The Tigers' 3-2 debacle against Missy State a few years ago was good for more than a few laughs, but the bright side of getting bogged down in a 3-2 game is that at least you still know your defense is getting the job done. Can't think of too many Auburn players on either side of the ball who met that standard in Starkville this past weekend.
11. Vanderbilt — James Franklin can have all the bravado in the world, but it won't add up to much until he gets the players.
12. Arkansas — OK, yeah, Arkansas fans, it's all well and good to use Tyler Wilson getting knocked out of the game as your excuse. But that still doesn't explain how the Razorback defense was able to fritter away a 28-7 lead in less than a quarter and a half. It's looking like the off-season turmoil in Fayetteville has taken a much bigger toll on this team than anyone wanted to admit.
13. Kentucky — In week 1 we saw Kent State nearly return a punt the length of the field the wrong way; in week 2 we saw them self-administer a safety. So no, Kentucky, I can't give you all that much credit for your win, no matter how big the margin of victory was.
14. Ole Miss — On the one hand, yeah, it does seem weird to still be putting the Rebels at the bottom when they're 2-0, especially below the likes of 1-1 Kentucky and Arkansas, to say nothing of 0-2 Auburn and Vanderbilt. But the Rebels have only played Central Arkansas and UTEP so far. Does anyone seriously think they're not poised to plummet to earth this weekend against Texas?