Washaun Ealey, This Is Your Extremely Eventful Life

It should come as no surprise that Georgia Bulldogs RB Washaun Ealey has gotten himself suspended from the team. What should instead startle the Georgia football observer is that Ealey took all this time off since his last amazing escapade -- getting socked in the face by Conference USA revelers* -- and this is the most exciting event he could come up with? Is he losing his touch, or have we just gotten spoiled by Ealey's headline-stealing talents?

Sure, being suspended for failing to participate in a "punishment run" (runs which he's apparently been doing at one interval or another since September) is novel and would qualify as a remarkable achievement for any regular college football player, but this suspension is minor Ealey at best, even if it is his second in the last half-year.

For most, the Ealey legend began when he was eye-gouged on national television by Florida Gators LB Brandon Spikes. While that was an especially noteworthy event, the truly Ealian nugget was the running back's subsequent defense of Spikes' behavior.

And even the casual fan had to take note of Ealey's 3:19 am hit-and-run arrest for hitting a parked car while sober and without a license, which gave the Dawgs serious late-summer momentum on their way to a 2010 Fulmer Cup victory. But there's so much more to Ealey than that. 

If you had to name which Georgia football player just happened to be on the scene of a bus accident, dashing to the aid of the unfortunate driver, you'd name Ealey, wouldn't you? Of course you would. And if you had to name any player in the nation capable of scoring a touchdown to an opposing team's approval, you'd ... yes, Ealey did that, too.

Middle of March? No college football news at all? Ealey's changing jersey numbers. Keep it moving.

And of course Ealey set Georgia's single-game rushing touchdown record, fumbled on the goal line against South Carolina, and fumbled on the goal line against Mississippi State all in the same season. A handful of exceptional players could achieve all that in a single year, but could they get their fumbles highlighted on College GameDay?

OK, maybe that can be done too. How about being benched for all those fumbles, then watching the backup fumble away yet another game? Now we're talking Ealey.

Kyle King of Dawg Sports, in his most prophetic moment, once predicted Ealey would "leave his mark" in Athens. I think we can all agree the mark is so much bigger than that.

* Even that Liberty Bowl punch delivered more than met the eye, like a Christmas Washaunnakah present. UCF coach George O'Leary later said Ealey started the whole thing.