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Dr. Mark Richt Cites Dr. Gene Chizik's Landmark 'Energy Vampires' Study

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Important update: Credit that noted Energy Vampire Hunter, Falcons coach Mike Smith, for importing Energy Anti-Vampirism into Athens.

When last we heard from Georgia Bulldogs coach Mark Richt, blogs based in New Hampshire or wherever were running wild with stories of his ignorance after catching wind of a story that undoubtedly falls into a folder labeled "Stories To Tell When Kidding Around." Those blogs are going to lose their minds after getting hold of Richt's latest head-turning claim, however: the Dawgs have been told to remain vigilant against Energy Vampires.

"Mark Richt thinks vampires control electricity" - blogs

Rival coach Gene Chizik has used the same term to refer to the same thing: lazy players. Is there something we're missing here?

Was there a must-read how-to-coach book released in the past year -- besides this one, of course -- that specified which breeds of calorie goblin a football team and specifically a college football team must be on the lookout for at all times?

Georgia players were also told to remain on the Energy Bus. Kind of think casting Energy Gasoline Siphoners as the parable's villains would've made more sense, since Energy Vampires feed on Energy Blood and not Energy Anything That's A Part Of A Bus, but at least this leads us to the source of all this electricity. According to an commenter, here's everything you need to know to join Odd Future Energy Bus No Vampires:

1) You're the driver of your bus 
2) Desire, vision, and focus move your bus in the right direction 
3) Fuel your ride with positive energy (negative energy is friction) 
4) Invite people on your bus and share your vision for the road ahead 
5) Don't waste your energy on those who don't get on your bus 
6) Post a sign that says no energy vampires allowed on your bus (get rid of the malcontents) 
7) Enthusiasm attracts more passengers and energizes them for the ride 
8) Love your passengers by giving them your time, listening, recognition, service - work to bring out the best in them 
9) Drive with purpose 
10) Have fun and enjoy the ride     

The offseason is almost over.

Photographs by coka_koehler used in background montage under Creative Commons. Thank you.